Home > Politics, Uncategorized, Women > DON’T HAGGLE WITH HOES: An Open Letter to the Secret Service

DON’T HAGGLE WITH HOES: An Open Letter to the Secret Service

Dear Secret Service Director, Mark Sullivan:

What a mess! I started off making jokes about the situation just like everyone else, “Secret Service doesn’t mean that you get serviced in secret.” The “wheels up, rings off” concept was ready-made for the late night comedians, and they pounced. The other pundits were still brewing last week’s tempest in their teapots (see “Mommy Cage Match: Romney vs. Reality”), so there was a lag time. Comedians like Jon Stewart saw comedy gold in the Madonna/Ho Transition the media was undertaking.

The politicians in Washington tend to move with the pundits, so you had a brief reprieve, which is over now. They have descended on the Secret Service like a pack of hungry wolves. Unfortunately, I have no sympathy for you or the agents under your command.

The Secret Service agents in Cartegena, Columbia forgot several important things. They forget something I heard is a key maxim, and it led to their downfall: DON’T HAGGLE WITH HOES. She earned her money in a manner that most of us would agree is…unorthodox, yet demanding work. As a result, she was not going to leave the Hotel Caribe without the money that was due to her.

I find this situation troubling for a variety of reasons. It raises several issues and concerns: the way this woman was treated and the way the President is protected.

The agent who caused the whole sordid affair to be exposed wanted to pay a professional $28 for $800 worth of services. The law has a concept called “quantum meruit” or unjust enrichment, which is defined by Black’s Law Dictionary as “An equitable doctrine, based on the concept that no one who benefits by the LABOR and materials of another should be unjustly enriched thereby…the law implies a PROMISE to pay a reasonable amount for the labor and materials furnished, even absent a specific contract therefor.” Prostitution is legal in Columbia. So the woman who was cheated out of $772 for engaging in lawful business has every right to demand payment. She had every right to go to the police. But the Secret Service agents who procured her services did not have ANY RIGHT to do so. They simply shouldn’t have been doing that. They were in Columbia on official business of the highest order – protecting the President of the United States.

You would think that these Secret Service agents would remember the Parable of Former Governor Eliot Spitzer. Also known as “Client-9,” Eliot Spitzer was tripped up because he wanted to have a credit of $1,100 on record with the agency, despite paying for the “escort services” of Ashley Dupree with $4400 in cash. The scandal, as you are aware, ended the very promising political career of Eliot Spitzer. But I guess since it was “wheels up, rings off,“ that meant that common sense also took a holiday in Columbia..

Here is my greatest concern.  Haggling with Hoes could have put the President’s life in jeopardy. The hoes with whom your agents were haggling could have decided that rather than wasting their time waiting for payment from the cheap Americans, they could simply steal some valuable, classified information that could have been left lying around and sell it to the highest bidder. In a country that was known for narco-terrorists like the late Pablo Escobar and Medellin drug cartel, this lapse in judgment was especially troubling. Renegade, the Secret Service Code Name for President Obama, came to Columbia not knowing how vulnerable he was. At the same time, Renaissance, the First Lady, and Radiance and Rosebud, Sasha and Melia, could also have been compromised. We don’t know. The Secret Service has a reputation of being the only thing between a lunatic and these individuals. We have operated through the years with the assumption that they would always do the right thing. Now we have reason to doubt that these men and women are capable of operating with the judgment needed for the task.

Director Sullivan, we forgave you for the security breach when the fame hungry, reality show star wannabes, Tareq and Michaele Salahi scammed their way into a state dinner. That was an alarming, yet low-stakes, breach. But this was on foreign soil. The Secret Service has not only embarrassed itself, it has embarrassed President Obama, and the United States.

The fact that two supervisors, Greg Stokes and David Chaney, and an agent have left the Secret Service as a result of this scandal is small comfort. Reports three agents resigned today and that more firings are imminent are also inadequate. The rhetoric directed at this president is especially violent. Remember that Candidate Barack Obama received protection from the Secret Service at a historically early point in his campaign due to the threats he received. As President, those threats have increased in number and intensity. The responsibility of the Secret Service is heightened.

Director Sullivan, if a single hair on the head of Renegade, Renaissance, Radiance or Rosebud is harmed, I will hold you and every man and woman in your command PERSONALLY RESPONSIBLE.

Maybe your agents need to re-read the Vision Statement of the Secret Service: The vision of the United States Secret Service is to uphold the tradition of excellence in its investigative and protective mission through a dedicated, highly-trained, diverse, partner-oriented workforce that employs progressive technology and promotes professionalism. Agents Hiring Hoes while on a security detail for the President is not professional. Agents Haggling with hoes while on a security detail for the President is not excellent.

The Congressional wolves are barking and scratching at your door. Your agents need to stop haggling with hoes. Protect the President.

Sincerely yours,

Pundit On Point

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Copyright 2012

Kimberly S. Jones

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  1. I have frienda who know...
    April 21, 2012 at 12:12 am

    Your knowledge of the pricing of 3rd world hoes leaves a LOT to be desired…

    There isn’t a 3rd world hoe ALIVE who would get $800 for a night….the standard rate for hoes at that club is $170…which includes the club owners take.

    The hoe was trying to extort what she likely saw as a rich gringo…no one would ever agree to $800 in Colombia…its absurd.

    • April 21, 2012 at 12:54 am

      This particular professional provided her services to two cheap gringos with poor judgment. Plus, we don’t know what services she was asked to provide. And haven’t you heard, America ratified a free trade agreement with Columbia? So Columbia isn’t a Third world country anymore, it’s an “emerging market.” that means the price of everything goes up, even prostitutes. Thanks for commenting. Keep reading and commenting!

      • I have friends who know...
        April 21, 2012 at 1:05 am

        $800 would easily get you THREE top notch prostitutes in any country in Central or South America…Brazil, Colombia, Costa Rica…why anyone would trust her word with respect to the pricing is ludicrous.

        She has less credibility than the woman in Baltimore who claimed to have the Mega Millions ticket…

        There are websites that spell out current hoe pricing…just like there are sites with current currency exchange rates…and $800 is so outside the realm of believable…

      • April 21, 2012 at 1:15 am

        Whether it was $800 or $80 is immaterial.Haggling with hoes is stupid. I think they thought they were going to get away with it because she was a prostitute. Haggling with an attorney blogger about the issue makes no sense either. The point remains the same, the Secret Service agents involved displayed poor judgment and potentially put the President in jeopardy.

  2. April 21, 2012 at 3:42 am

    What kind of rational judgement must these guys have to be in a foreign country, assigned to the president and even be thinking about hiring ladies of the night? How stupid can they be? If I was the president I would not want to have these guys in my employ, period. Just very, very bad judgement and what would they do if an incident occurred. I mean, one of those ladies could have been a Cuban Dr.?

    • April 21, 2012 at 6:44 pm

      These are the judgment questions that arise. I don’t understand the folks who say the situation isn’t a big deal. Just because no one was shot doesn’t mean that everything is okay. The Secret Service has to do the same sort of soul searching everyone is demanding of the GSA. But the Secret Service must evaluate and course immediately, because it is a matter of life or death. There is no margin for error. This is the Secret Service’s second chance.

  3. April 23, 2012 at 1:10 pm

    …Has Director Sullivan been called to the carpet for what happened on his watch? And thanks to the reader whose comments literally demonstrated the haggling of the hoes!!!

    • April 24, 2012 at 11:00 pm

      Amazingly, despite the fact that more agents lost their jobs today, Secret Service Director Mark Sullivan still has his job. Sullivan was a Bush Administration appointee who enjoys bipartisan support, which sounds foreign when describing anything to do with Washington these days. Most, including President Obama, are chalking this up to a few bad apples. But it only takes one crazy person to do harm, so screw the bad apple idea.

      As for the reader who passionately disputed the costs of “hoes” in Columbia… what can you do? I hope that reader returns on Friday to see what I am stirring up this week. Thanks for reading!

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